This is Purity. I've had her since my day of birth. She didn't always look so mangled. When I was little,
I would dress her in pretty clothes every day and play with her. I even once gave her a haircut, thinking that it would
grow back. God... I loved her to death.
Then one day... I wanted to hurt her instead of hurting myself. I wanted her to be bloody and ugly and scarred
for life. So every day she had another fresh wound. Every day she had a part of her fragile body burned.
She even stored the blades for me under the skin in the middle of her back. I sewed them up tight back there so I would
have a harder time getting at them. I knew if I tried to get them, it would rip her skin more and make her cry.
I wouldn't let myself hurt her just to be able to hurt myself. I hate myself for torturing her like I did. But
she understood, even though we both hated it. She wanted to take the pain away from me, even if just the physical aspect
of it. She wanted to see me happy.
.....
i'll never see her again. :'( I miss her more than I can even express.
.....
I gave her up. One night at bible camp... the preacher was talking about giving up stuff that's harmful to your
spirit. (or something like that) The next thing I knew I was placing Purity in the hands of my youth pastor.
Even as I'm writing this, I can feel the rage swelling up inside of me. I abandoned her just like my mother had done
to me.
